INSPIRING LIFE SCHOOL PODCAST
EPISODE 8
5 TRUTH BOMBS YOU CAN’T IGNORE IN LIFE
INSPIRING LIFE SCHOOL PODCAST
EPISODE 8 TRANSCRIPT:
5 TRUTH BOMBS YOU CAN’T IGNORE IN LIFE
Hello and welcome to this episode which is all about 5 truth bombs to change your life.
So for those who aren’t aware that I have written more than 20 books and one of them is WHAT WILL IT TAKE FOR YOU TO UNDERSTAND? which was the inspiration for my Wake Up Call You Need Master course.
This book and course speak about 50 truth bombs that you need to understand to free yourself from that constant pain and suffering cycle that so many of us get caught up in.
And because I love this book so much I thought it would be fun to share with you five of those truth bombs here in todays episode.
So without further ado, here they are:
TRUTH BOMB 1:
HOLDING ONTO ANGER HURTS YOU MORE THAN THE OTHER PERSON
Buddha once said: “holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.”
He said it was like “grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else but you are the one who gets burned.”
The only problem is – we all get angry. It’s human nature to feel this way.
As kids we throw tantrums; as adults we sulk, scream, cry, complain when we don’t get our own way.
Anger is one of those feelings that make our mouths work a lot faster than our minds.
It isn’t a pretty emotion.
People think because they are angry they have permission to be cruel.
They tend to do things that are permanently stupid when they are temporarily upset.
And for what reason?
Anger doesn’t solve anything but it can destroy everything in a heartbeat.
For every minute you are angry you lose 60 seconds of happiness.
Mark Twain was right when he said “anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.”
Holding onto anger only hurts you, not them.
Here are a few lessons I have learnt along the way in life:
- The more anger you carry in your heart towards the past, the less capable you are of loving in the present.
- Anger makes you smaller while forgiveness forces you to grow beyond what you were.
- Getting angry is actually punishing yourself with the mistakes of others.
The truth is we cannot let anger overshadow the good things in our life.
Confucius suggested “when anger rises think of the consequences.”
This means when you are angry it is best to hesitate and delay your response because things will seem different once you have cooled down.
When you get angry at others you have allowed them get the better of you.
So you need to learn to keep your anger under control.
You need to learn to view it from a place of understanding instead of rage.
Like everything in life, anger passes with time.
If you are patient in a moment of anger you will escape a hundred days of sorrow and regret.
If you choose to hold onto it instead, anger will only steal your energy and keep you from experiencing love. And is that what you really want in life?
You GET TO MAKE THAT CHOICE.
TRUTH BOMB 2: THINGS CAN ALWAYS BE BETTER BUT THEY CAN ALWAYS BE WORSE
It is funny to think this truth bomb came to me while watching the children’s Christmas cartoon Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.
In the movie Slyly the fox sings words that are truer than true. He says:
Yes things could be better in this big universe
But remember it could always be worse
So for every step forward
There’s a step in reverse
If the glass looks half empty
And your prospects are low
Attitude adjustment’s the only way to go
Let me give you an attitude adjustment right now.
- If you have food in your fridge, clothes in your cupboard, a roof over your head and a place to sleep in, you are richer than 75% of the world.
- If you have money in the bank or in your wallet and some spare change to share, you are among the top 8% of the worlds wealthy.
- If you woke up this morning feeling healthy and not ill, you are more blessed than the million people who will not survive this week.
- If you have never experienced the danger of battle, the torture of imprisonment or warfare or the pangs of starvation, you are luckier than 500 million people alive and suffering.
- If you can read this message you are more fortunate than 3 billion people in the world who cannot read at all.
- As you waste your breath complaining about life or another terrible problem, someone else out there in this world is breathing their last breath.
So next time you think you are having a bad day I want you to think about the people who have no access to water or no home to live in at all.
I want you to think about those who are living in a war-torn country or are struggling with a terminal illness.
When everything seems overwhelming, look around and consider what other people might have to cope with in their daily life.
Just when you think it can’t get any worse, something or someone will come along to prove you wrong. You may potentially be a lot more fortunate than you first believed.
The best way to enjoy your own life right now is to stop comparing it to others.
Count your rainbows and not your thunderstorms.
Count your blessings and not your problems.
Appreciate everything you DO have. Life is full of blessings, sometimes we just too blind to see them.
If you think your problems outnumber your blessings, count them again.
Chances are the things you take for granted were not added.
There is always, always something to be thankful for.
Don’t become one of those people who have everything and yet still want more.
Jealously is when you count someone else’s blessings instead of your own.
We seem inclined to count our miseries carefully and accept our blessings without much thought, when there are people in this world who have nothing and are still grateful with the little they have.
Consider this: there are many individuals who will never have what you have right now.
We take so many things for granted: clothing, electricity, water, love, friendships, our work, our schools and our homes.
The things you take for granted are the same things someone else is praying for.
Gratitude turns what we have into enough.
If you want to feel rich, count all the things you have that money cannot buy.
Talk about your blessings more than you talk about your burdens.
This is the secret to happiness: counting your blessings while everyone else is adding up their troubles.
TRUTH BOMB 3:
MOST THINGS YOU WORRY ABOUT NEVER EVENTUATE
There’s an English proverb that says: worrying is like sitting in a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn’t get you anywhere.
I love this because it’s true- 99% of the things we worry about never happen.
People are well-known for worrying about stuff like:
Body Image
Physical Appearance
Family Conflict
Grades
Potential Career
Crushes
Peer Pressure
Not being accepted
Meeting everyone else’s expectations
Now there is little point in telling you not to worry at all because it is a normal human trait to do so.
Babies worry about when they will get their next feed.
Kids worry if their toy truck or doll will be broken by the rough kid playing with it.
Adults worry about their work and old people worry about dying.
But here’s the thing – MOST OF THE STUFF WE WORRY ABOUT NEVER HAPPENS SO WHY DO WE NEED TO WORRY SO MUCH?
The best advice I’ve ever heard is this:
If you can solve your problem, then what is the need of worrying?
If you cannot solve it, then what is the use of worrying?
This is such life changing advice I want you to read it again in the words of Dalai Lama:
If a problem is fixable, if a situation is such that you can do something about it, then there is no need to worry. If it’s not fixable then there is no help in worry. Dalai Lama
I love this quote because it tells us there is no benefit in worrying whatsoever.
Can you solve the problem?
Then there is no need to worry about it.
You can’t solve the problem?
Then there is no use worrying about it.
Worrying is a total waste of time.
It doesn’t change anything.
All it does is steal your joy and keep you busy doing nothing.
Worrying will never change the outcome, so don’t overthink things or you will create a problem that wasn’t even there in the first place.
Or your head will be so full of worries, there won’t be any room for anything else.
So do what you can to stop worrying so much today.
When this truth bomb brightens your life, sometimes it’s as easy as telling your brain to STOP.
Take a deep breath and understand worrying doesn’t actually take away your troubles.
To the contrary, it is a total waste of time and doesn’t change anything at all.
Worrying about things you can’t control only takes away your peace and empties you of your precious strength.
Instead of worrying about all the things that can go wrong, think about the things that can go right.
Think about the constructive action you can take today to make things better.
It also helps for some people to focus on one day at a time.
Don’t worry about things that are one year, five years, ten years or twenty years away.
Just focus on making today the best it can be and you can worry about tomorrow the next day.
One day you will look back and realise you worried too much about things that don’t matter.
The day you stop worrying will be your first day of your new life; anxiety takes you in circles, trust in yourself and become free. Leon Brown
TRUTH BOMB 4:
YOU WILL NEVER BE POPULAR WITH EVERYONE
When we are young, we spend a lot of time trying to please everyone.
We want our parents to be happy, we want our teachers to be happy, we want our friends to be happy.
Sometimes it’s easy, other times its hard work because the truth is there’s always at least one person who is annoyed, upset, angry, jealous or simply doesn’t like you.
It’s a gift when this truth bomb goes off because when you accept you will NEVER be popular with everyone you can finally give up trying.
You are not designed for everyone to like you.
Not everyone is going to want, accept or know how to receive your energy.
You can be the most glorious, perfect apple in the world and there will still be someone who hates apples with a passion.
Sometimes this is a difficult lesson to learn in life.
Not everyone will like you but guess what? Not everyone matters.
When you are truly comfortable in your own skin, you don’t give a sh#t about who does or doesn’t like you.
You don’t care one bit!
That’s because confidence isn’t about thinking “they will like me.”
It’s about knowing you will be fine if they don’t.
It might hurt a bit when you discover someone you care about no longer likes you but you need to learn to make peace with that.
Take a deep breath, hold your head up high, and walk ahead with your dignity still intact.
Like Iyanla Vanzant once said: “Everybody does not have to like you. That is not their job. Liking you is not anyone’s purpose except yours.”
Never allow those who don’t like you to become more important than those who love you.
Never sacrifice who you are because someone has a problem with some part of your personality.
Not everyone will understand you but the ones who do, will appreciate all your wonderful qualities.
You are a work of art – remember that.
In this world some people will hate you and some people will love you. If someone hates you, who cares?
Let them hate all they want.
You can’t please everyone and you shouldn’t live to please everyone else.
You live to please yourself.
Margaret Thatcher once said: “if you set out to be liked, you would be prepared to compromise on anything at any time and you would achieve nothing.”
Some of the unhappiest people in the world are those who care too much or are too preoccupied with what other people think.
Don’t worry so much about family, friends or strangers who ignore you or act like you don’t matter.
Not everyone will understand your journey. That’s fine. It’s not their journey to make sense of it. It’s yours.
Living true to yourself is the only thing you need to worry about.
You have to figure out who is worth your kindness and time because your value doesn’t decrease based on someone’s inability to see your worth.
As Arthur Forman said: “Not everyone thinks the way you think, believes the things you believe, nor acts the way you would act.”
Remember this and sleep well tonight. After all, a tiger has never lost sleep over the opinion of sheep
TRUTH BOMB 5:
ENJOY THE JOURNEY BECAUSE THAT’S ALL THERE IS
Ursula Le Guin once said: “It is good to have an end to journey towards, but it is the journey that matters in the end.”
We don’t realise this straight away.
Some of us waste years and years focused on reaching some imaginary finish line in life that we forget to enjoy the journey along the way.
Then one day everything falls into place and the truth bomb switches on.
Maybe it’s not about the happy ending.
Maybe it’s about the story.
Maybe life itself is the greatest journey we will ever be on.
Once we have this truth bomb, we realise we have no choice but to find the joy in our journey.
Life is unfolding exactly as it should be and we aren’t here forever so we need to take the time to stop and smell the roses along the way.
It doesn’t matter if we can’t see the bigger picture yet or if the road is full of twists and turns.
That’s okay – we need to stop worrying about those potholes and enjoy the ride instead.
Because maybe that’s all there is – the journey.
And maybe it isn’t so much about becoming anything special or reaching a specific destination.
Maybe it’s about un-becoming everything that isn’t really you, letting all the smokescreens, expectations and pretences drop.
The goal is that in the end you can be who you were meant to be in the first place.
It’s true the road is as long as it is short and the journey is our real destination.
In the end, you won’t measure your journey in miles or steps but in the friends and experiences you have collected along the way.
Sooner or later we will all see there is no station, no special place you need to arrive. The trip is all there is.
Ready to take the next step?
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Hey, I’m Frances Vidakovic! I help you live a richer, lighter life while pursuing dreamy goals – without sacrificing your soul, sanity or family life. 🫶🏻 Author. Coach. Course Creator. DON’T DIE UNHAPPY! → Wake up. Do what matters. Savour it all 🌷